This is not one of my normal posts. I'm participating in an exercise to see if I can post to my blog on a daily basis. I keep a written journal everyday of things that I have done whether they be daily mundane tasks, like picking up dog poop, or traveling to a birding site followed by lunch with friends.
On days that I spend house bound (my own choice) reading, massaging photos, or playing in my garden, I'm have a big hard drive spinning in the back of my mind reliving my life, seven decades worth. I think the hard drive is about seven tera bytes.
Sometimes I'm reliving my childhood, thinking about my parents, my siblings, and close relatives. What we see as children looks different played through the eyes of a mature adult. Maybe we have a better feel for our parents' emotions when they were unhappy with each other, shouting and yelling, slamming doors and stomping through the house. Maybe we understand how they felt about money, and what effect that had on our lives in a good or bad way.
I know we all play the "what if" game. What if I hadn't gotten married so young and gone through college in four years like some of my classmates did? What if I had chosen a different career? That wasn't a problem for me: I had five. What if I hadn't had children?
Sometimes the drive spins thinking about my children: how they were when they were little compared to the grown-ups they've become. Parents worry about doing right by their children and making sure they have every opportunity that they missed. I was never that way, because I was taught to create my own opportunities and be self-sufficient. That's one thing that my children thank me for passing along to them.
It's funny how the hard drive pulls up a name from the past that you never expected to remember and you wonder how that person is doing or is even still alive. You remind yourself that you need to keep in touch with close friends and family now TODAY, but you wonder if you'll make the effort.
My hard drive is extremely entertaining, but it's only there to be brought out and enjoyed when I'm not dealing with the here and now: traveling, taking pictures, trying new restaurants or meeting new people.
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